Did you know that scripture says to grieve your sin?
James 4:9 declares:
Let there be tears for what you have done. Let there be sorrow and deep grief. Let there be sadness instead of laughter, and gloom instead of joy. – NLT
Have you grieved your sin lately? I know I used to think it was better to either ignore it, or move on quickly. Thinking, “Well, I messed that up but I’ll do better next time.”
But what happens when we do either of those things, is we continue to dwell in it. Whether unconsciously or not, that sin is not necessarily removed from us until we repent and confess – which requires acknowledgement of what you have done.
It took me a looooooong time to acknlowedge I was a sinner. Like, post-college kind of long time. I just didn’t want to admit weakness. I didn’t want to admit that I wasn’t perfect. I didn’t want to admit that I sucked, failed, and was a real human who makes mistakes.
You know what else I didn’t want to do? Cry. Crying was for the vulnerable and weak. And I might’ve been semi-vulnerable, but I was certainly not weak.
However, scripture DECLARES that we are to grieve our sin. To cry tears over what you have done.
One of my Jericho prayers simply says: “Grieve.” Since I’ve never really dealt with things in a godly way before, I needed prayer over how to grieve in the Lord. To lay down all my hurts and past sin from 26 years, and grieve it all.
Then the other night when I came before Him to pray about it, I broke down with the weight of everything I’ve ever done.
“Lord, I know your Word declares that I am washed clean by your Son’s blood. That He died for my sins that you knew I would commit. That you sent your Son to take those sins to the grave with Him and leave them there, so that I might be freed from them. How could I have betrayed you so much, then? How could I have rebelled against you countless times like I have? How could I?”
It was rough. But I began to realize that while dealing with my sin and grieving was good, at some point, I needed to stop grieving. At some point, I’d need to let it all go. I needed to start declaring truth over myself, to fill up the holes and the gaps that have consumed me for so long by not letting go of or appropriately dealing with my sin.
And while I was afraid to stop praying over the word “Grieve,” I knew I needed to cover it with something new. So I wrote a new Jericho prayer and placed it over the old:
I am forgiven.
I am washed clean.
I have been offered grace.
I am not rejected.
These are truths that, as the Lord and I scrape out the muck of my heart together and begin to heal and deal with it all, I need to replace that muck with His goodness.
The Father is good in His perfect timing too. I wrote that new prayer on February 28, 2018 [two days ago]. Yesterday, my buddy Cory Frederick posted a picture of me from a photoshoot we had a few weeks ago and captioned it with this:
“These moments are what make photography so rewarding. Capturing a person’s soul in one brief moment and how it can reflect who they are on the inside. Ariane’s soul is absolute joy. Along with many other characteristics, of course 🙂 #WhiteIsHerFavorite #WhiteReflectsPureness”
I text him immediately letting him know that I needed to hear “White reflects pureness.” Because I’ve been struggling to believe it.
So, my question for you is this:
When is the last time you’ve grieved over your sin? And have you let it go and laid it at the Lord’s feet? Or are you still holding onto it, allowing it to define your identity? If you still need to let it go, trust that it’s ok to let it go once you’ve acknowledged, confessed, and repented of it… just don’t forget to replace it with truths about who God declares that you are.