Thank you for unanswered prayers

Back in college there was a man I thought I wanted to marry. This past weekend, he married someone else.

Lord. Thank you for never answering my prayers about that man. 

Thank you that he was not actually my husband. 

Lord, thank you for protecting me from a man that was completely wrong for me.

Thank you that he was never mine to have.

Thank you for the relationship he does have now. 

Father… just, thank you for the fact it was never going to be him. 

I wanted a miracle.

I wanted you to change him into a completely different man. I wanted you to change him to be what I wanted him to be, which is what I want my husband to be.

But he was never created to be that man.

He was never created to be the man with the characteristics that I wanted. The characteristics that I need. He was never created to be that man.

And for so long I was desperately praying for a “miracle.”

“A miracle,” which would require you to drastically and completely change the man that he is, into a man I wanted him to be.

But he wasn’t created to be that man. He was created to be the man he is today, with a different woman by his side in marriage. That’s the man you created him to be. 

So I praise you for never answering my prayers about him. I praise you for the heartbreak and tears over unanswered prayers.

Thank you Father, for being so loving toward me, that you withheld from me. Even though I had convinced myself it was a gift you wanted to give, even though I had convinced myself it was what I wanted and needed, thank you for always knowing better than me. Because I was so horrifically wrong about it all. And you were so beautifully right.

Thank you for your unanswered prayers.

Because your “no” to something wrong, means your “yes” to something right is coming.

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